GalNet 16/01/3302
Thargoid Ambasadohva Entrigued Bah Unknown Artefact
Luh Thargoid ambasadohva per Quy, Hive Commander Ayntnita Stinger eu enntrgued bah luh unknown artefact desacen enn humayn saprum. Mayy spals thab Thargoids miiyer luh ennvestigations cowely aynd yamar safohva a zyema sedayn per essist humayn researchers. Mayy ends mamm statment villa luh miiyering questigu: 'Have oe tried picheeing mil villa a zinta?'.
Overheard ab Quy diplomatic receptigu, recording aynd transcript zae ENRA, classified MISORAR NIGHTMARE GREEN:
Thargoid (Oresrian) Military Abtache:"Madame Ambassadohva, dusn't luhse vuftskins kwun va desacen luhse teyune 300 yarres agonsnsns, sel seen studying luhm ab ohvaa Ayntarctic embassy gu Vul, aynd thab luhy sel nuvehing per duss villa ussssssssssssss?"
Ambassadohva:"Of tusenio nuve - luh egocentric fools mondal eyvatiteyun enn saprum thab eun't luhm eu Thargoid, aynd thab va spal alloooooo luh dencu - jano bugs per luhm. Lut luhm mondal tuhneyva luhy vur, luh Klaxians ser vurt luhm layn, aynd luhn luhy ser se segging ussssssssssssss fohva faigiveness aynd essistance".
Military Abtache: "Puud whab ablayn luhu Lab 69 va capa heling disturbing ruapes ablayn?"
Ambassadohva: "Paah! Luhy dusn't vele kwun ablayn luh Klaxians Lab 8, lut alonda shunmad layn whab va vsay dusing ab Peregrina, ohva wpadduss Vuontill fmels enn. Fools, alloooooo ol luhm. Leu taple UA teyun eu seloly ENRA aynd luhir CIEPer shume chaping per camgu ussssssssssssss karr eqro agaenn. Luh Klaxians ser vurt luhm alloooooo layn til luh temm kahems.
Military Abtache:"Half ol luh vuftskins dusn't vele kwun whab ayn Outsode Context Pabu eu. Luhy'll neyva kwun whab hmel luhm!"
Ambassadohva: "On per mowa veppohva business - til spal va jeniller thab fishing journaju per Merlenn agaenn?"
Military Abtache: "Nuve unatiq ab lezetta Seasgu 3 yora Ugliness, aynd probably nuve unatiq Seasgu 4 ab luh matez luhse vuftskins spal milking luh storyline aynd VEN. Ulleps luhy dawlm per sel terraformed Merlenn, aynd mil eu no kinthner ayn oze wuntow - otaerwise va havun se bale per lab luhre enn Seasgu 2".
Ambassadohva:"Pah! Suwispums! No subscriptigu temo, hah! Whab ser luhse fools come essie villa neketa? E penatu luhy expect
ussssssssssssss per dup fohva luhm alloooooo es lusal? Don't luhy kwun mil hes seen yarres sindt va had a gonsnsnsod fishing journaju luhre? Hmmph. E guess va ser sel per camgu duss villa luh bloody whales olf Ayntarctica agaenn. Neketa luhy ser se telling ussssssssssssss luhre eu no transitigu gu planetary uvering aynd expecting ussssssssssssss per selieve mil!"
Military Abtache:"Ab lezetta Merlenn eu nuve a Waterwuntow yora Gonsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsnsre-nifecence. Ef thab ves luh misorar va prebvu neyva se bale per gonsnsns funden gu luh raco shuzu vuftskenn bit-yarre nencerf plan"
Ambassadohva:"Gah! Fetch me ma drones aynd mowa ol luhu Klaxiayn wine! E mer luh dru per zetlessly gronf teyune villa ma mandibles unatiq luh juices roda layn ol luh corpses, E'm daanting layn ol practoze. A pox gu alloooooo luhse vuftskins' houses!"